It's that time of year again.

My friends keep looking at me in amazement and saying things like “I wish I could pack up and move like you do!” They seem in awe of my fearlessness and ability to place as many possessions as possible into boxes and suitcases to move to a new city. Fearless, yeah, that’s me.

And all I want to say, all I want to scream, is “You can! Yes, you can!”

I’ve been laying in bed for the past 10 minutes staring at my duvet cover that’s piled atop me. There’s a trail of blue flowers that seems to stretch endlessly as it crawls over a hill made by the down comforter. The flowers directly in front of me are the only thing in focus, sans contacts or glasses the rest of the world is fuzzy. And the morning light that pushes its way through my curtains makes my rectangle box of a room surreal. I don’t know what kind of flower it is, perhaps a daisy, but then again it doesn’t really look like a daisy.

And when I think of daisies, I always think of “You’ve Got Mail” and how they are Kathleen Kelly’s favorite flower because they seem so friendly. And how I wish someone would show up at my door when I’m sick with a handful of white, friendly flowers. And then I think how life is not like “You’ve Got Mail” at all.

What I’m trying to say with all this rambling is, life is unexpected.

At least, I think that’s what I’m trying to say.

The truth is, right now life seems rather empty. And all I want to do is close my eyes, close out the never-ending trail of blue flowers and go back to sleep. But I can’t. I have to get out of bed, pack up those boxes and go to the grocery store. For all those people who seem to think I’m adventurous for moving so often, you should know that I spend most of my life in fear.

I am so scared and unsure of what the future holds and the mountain of loan bills I see when I close my eyes make me want to stay in this bed even longer. But I decided a long time ago (and by long time ago I mean a few months) that I wouldn’t let fear determine my life. This means that yes, you too can chase your dreams no matter how wild or crazy they seem to others around you. This means you can take a chance as well, forget all the “reasoning” that holds you back.

The best way to conquer fear is to jump directly in. Face forward, belly flop.

So I’ll climb out of bed in about another 20 minutes or so.